Old Things

Publishment

"Carl"-Works By Women 2011

Lena Ryan

“Carl”

V.3

CAST

SUE-late 30’s-Megan’s mother/frustrated with being a newly divorced parent.

MEGAN-9 ½-younger Meg/bright/opinionated

MEG-29-Street smart/bitter/a bit of a mess with a little heart still left.

(SUE stands outside of MEGAN’s door knocking on it)

SUE

Megan! No locked doors in this house. Let me in.

MEGAN

Leave me alone! I only want dad.

                                                            

               SUE                
Well, he lives 20 minutes away now. (beat) You can’t shut me out forever.  

                                                         

The Agenda

At 8:19am, the self-deposed Queen of Alaska drinks her coffee while staring at the White House from her bay windows at the Mayflower Hotel. She is feeling invincible standing there towering over the city, planning her attack, like a helicopter fly over a day before a wolf hunt. But by 11am, her mood has deflated. A firm reprimand to her oldest daughter about not having an ounce of “god damned discretion” after spending all night in the hotel’s hot tub with various boys from Georgetown’s Young Republicans Club turned into a hallway screaming match. It has left Mrs. Palin feeling uneasy and reflective. She wants to return to this morning when her perky assistant announced that the producers of the Today Show and Oprah were both begging for her appearance on the same Tuesday and a Britney Spears level of paparazzi jostled outside with each other over prime sidewalk spots.

A Golden Boy

I have three brothers. Well, one died when I was nine. But still at one time, I had all three.

No, I don’t mind telling.

My father was away for the summer. He was a baseball scout for the Florida Marlins. They were brand new then, an expansion team. It was a busy, bright time for him. This gave my mother all summer to drink and the income to do it. And I don’t mean this negatively. Just truthfully. She was a very fun drunk. We would have big parties, all the adults laughing into each other as I ran underneath them like eucalyptus trees erupting in the wind.

This summer my mom had a three week long party up north at a private campground. It was woodsy yet refined in a way. Like a more lonely version of the Catskills resort in Dirty Dancing. I say lonely because although there was a staff, there wasn’t any activities. My mom and her friends unsteadied the days with gin and tonics. Us kids pulled rough stones out from the grounds and swore they were arrowheads. We were desperate for an adventure.

A Couple of Bosses

I got bored, made one, and sent it in. Let's see if they publish it on http://textsfromhillaryclinton.tumblr.com/